


Demon cat burglar

by elphabun



Series: Drabbles [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, this cat loves making madara's life hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-23
Updated: 2017-01-23
Packaged: 2018-09-19 08:33:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9430232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elphabun/pseuds/elphabun
Summary: "My cat keeps going to your house to eat and you got my number off the new collar I gave him” AU





	

**Author's Note:**

> For an anon prompt on tumblr. "My cat keeps going to your house to eat and you got my number off the new collar I gave him” AU

“What the—” Madara yelps and jumps back almost half a foot, trips over a shoe and falls hard onto his side.

Seething, he glares at the grey and white ball of fluff staring down at him from atop his fridge.

“You little shit,” he curses and picks himself up off the floor. “If you kill me you’re not getting any food, just so you know.”

It only cocks its head and purrs.

The damn cat has been breaking into his apartment almost every day for the past two weeks. First it had been eating the the leftover sandwiches on the counter, then when Madara stopped leaving food out it figured out how to open the fridge. In the interests of keeping his food safe, Madara now buys tuna for the little monster.

He groans at the twinge in his ribs and walks over to the pantry, the cat jumping down and following him. He takes out a can of tuna and the cat meows and tries to jump up his body to reach it.

“Nuh-uh.” He pushes it away with his foot.

He sets the can on the counter and as soon as he opens it the cat is right there gorging itself. Madara runs a hand down its back, snorting at the fat he feels. He rubs up to the cat’s neck and frowns when his hand hits something. He grabs at it and pushes fur away from the spot to see a pale blue collar wrapped around the neck.

 _Huh_ , Madara thinks. _That wasn’t there before._ He feels at the front of the collar and pulls a tag away from its neck. _Raijin_ , it reads, and there’s a phone number underneath. Madara smiles and takes out his phone. Finally, he can get rid of this cat. Whoever it is that owns it better keep a damn leash on it now that Madara knows it’s not a stray.

He dials the number and the call is answered with a low growl. Madara frowns, confused, and then– “What?” The word is sharp, and Madara bristles.

“Your cat is in my apartment. Come get it,” Madara practically demands.

There’s a pause while the person on the other line processes, and then a sigh.  
“What apartment are you?” The man asks, sounding a mix of relieved and exasperated.

“212. It’s right by the fire stairs,” Madara says, and then the call goes dead.

Madara pulls the phone away and looks at it. That guy actually hung up on him. He scowls and starts rubbing the cat again.

* * *

  
Ten minutes later, Madara is trying to keep the cat from scratching up his couch when there’s a knock at the door. Oh thank fuck.

“Coming,” he yells and pulls away from the cat, wincing at the stinging pain on his hands as he walks over.

He opens the door and there’s a white-haired man standing before him, looking somewhat familiar, though Madara doesn’t know where he’s seen him before. The man’s face is blank, and Madara gestures inside.

“Come in, your cat is destroying my couch,” he says through a tight smile.

The man gives him a short nod and walks in, looks around, then goes straight for where the cat is now scratching up a pillow.

“Raijin,” he scolds, scooping the devil animal up.

Madara looks despairingly at the tears on his favorite pillow, and the marks on the base of his couch. The guy turns to him, and Madara glares at the cat cradled in his arms.

“I’m Tobirama,” the man says, holding a hand out to Madara. “Sorry for any inconvenience Raijin has caused you; she’s normally very well-behaved.”

Madara doesn’t believe that for a second, but he huffs and shakes the hand anyways. Internally he’s trying to think. The name Tobirama sounds really familiar.

“Yeah, whatever,” he grumbles. “I blew 20 dollars feeding that monster, and it repaid me by ruining my pillows.”

Tobirama looks a bit embarrassed at that, and Madara is viciously satisfied. If he can’t keep his pet from running off and complicating other people’s lives, then he _should_ be embarrassed.

“Right,” Tobirama says, leaning forward. “If you want I could make it up to you,” he suggests. “Buy you a dinner.”

That… isn’t such a bad idea, actually. Disregarding the irresponsible pet ownership, Tobirama is attractive and Madara knows they’ve met sometime before. Friend of a friend, probably, so it wouldn’t be too bad.

He shrugs. “Alright, that sounds good. Tomorrow maybe?”

Tobirama smiles and nods. Madara realizes that he never actually introduced himself and his face flushes.

“I’m Madara Uchiha, by the way,” he blurts out, the embarrassed one now.

Tobirama raises an eyebrow. “I know.”

Madara frowns and asks, “How, exactly?” Is he going to find out where he knows Tobirama from?

“I was at Hashirama’s birthday party last month,” Tobirama says with an air of amusement that makes Madara feel judged.

Wait.

“You're _Tobi?_ ” He asks, incredulous. How did he not remember the name of his brother’s best friend? Hashirama never shuts up about him.

This time Tobirama actually laughs. “Yes, I am.”

Madara’s cheeks burns even more and he crosses his arms over his chest. “Whatever,” he says. “It’s completely understandable. I always tune Hashirama out whenever he starts going on about his friends because he’ll go on for fifteen minutes.”

Tobirama snorts. “He does the same about you, but at least I pay attention.”

Madara is about to retort but then the cat breaks into the conversation with a yowl and Madara jerks back when it leaps out of Tobirama’s arms and runs out the door. Madara is glad to see it go.

Tobirama sighs and looks put-out. “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow then,” he says and moves forward.

Madara nods and walks with him to the door. “See you,” he says and waves a bit as Tobirama walks out.

Tobirama gives him a little smile and goes of in pursuit of his cat.

* * *

  
“I can’t believe your demon cat burglar was Tobi’s cat!” Hashirama laughs so hard he almost falls off of his chair, and Madara is tempted to shove him the rest of the way.

“Shut up,” he grumbles, his face pink.

Hashirama laughs again. “And you’re going out with him? I’m so happy for you two!”

Madara huffs and crosses his arms. “It’s one dinner, not a date. He’s making up for his cat costing me a bunch of money in tuna,” he says, looking determinedly away.

Hashirama snorts. “Sure it is. Oh well, it’ll happen sooner or later. You two will get along so well.”

Madara watches in disgust as his friend starts sniffling.

“My brother and my best friend. I’m such a lucky person,” Hashirama says, a hand placed dramatically over his heart.

Right, time to leave. Madara stands and stalks to the door, pushing Hashirama’s chair over as he passes. _Ah, what a wonderful sound_ , Madara thinks as Hashirama shrieks and crashes to the floor.


End file.
